Henry, your diaper is full...please let me change it

Dear Henry,
You can't be comfortable with a 9 lb diaper full of urine. It is hanging down to the floor because it is so full. It is way past capacity. Please let me change your diaper, son. Don't run away with your crack showing because your poor diaper is so heavy. Why do you hate to have you diaper changed? You have no idea how good you have it. Enjoy it while you can, because the world of underoos is cruel and unforgiving to the pant-wetter. It stops being cute whenever you ruin someone's mattress because your pee penetrated to the springs. I speak from unfortunate experience. Those days are a' comin, so "soak" it up while you can.